DEAR DOCTOR LOVE, I have a very serious problem that I have been too ashamed to discuss with anybody. My name is Kike and I am 23 years old. My best friend’s name is Angela and we have been friends since our secondary school days. The problem I have is with her boyfriend, I think I have fallen in love with the guy. He’s a very cute guy. And I have caught him looking at me in a strange way too. Something tells me he knows I like him and I think he likes me too. But he knows Angela and I are very close so he can’t come after me. And I can’t go after him too. What can I do, Mr. Wale, I really love this guy. Please, conceal my number, my friend reads a lot of magazines.
KIKE, I would’ve preferred to speak with you via phone. To start with, I would’ve loved to ask you, do you have a boyfriend yourself? If you don’t, then I think that’s where your problem is coming from. If you have your own man, you will not be lusting after your best friend’s lover. What do you want her to think of you if she finds out you have been lusting after her man, do you think she will ever trust you again? Secondly, I would’ve loved to ask you if you understand what it means to stab a friend in the back because that is exactly what you’re about to do now. I will advice you get your mind off your best friend’s man, it can only bring you nothing but trouble. If you do not have a boyfriend, then open your doors for your own man to come in so you can divert all your love and affection to him instead of lusting after Angela’s sweetheart.
DOCTOR WALE, I have a problem and I need your help to solve it. There is this guy whom I have been dating for about eight months now. We met through a mutual friend. Our relationship took off faster than I planned because he was practically all over me. He never gave me a breathing space, always calling to check up on me and wanting to take me out on a date. And before I knew what was happening, I had fallen in love with him. There is hardly a weekend that we do not spend together and a lot of his friends are already used to me. But lately, he just changed. He no longer spends time with me like he used to and does not call me like he used to when we first started. Even sex between us has dropped greatly. I have asked him repeatedly if there is a problem or there’s something I have done to offend him but he says there’s no such thing, that he’s just been under pressure with work. I know he’s lying, he’s not under any work pressure. But do you think he‘s already tired of the relationship so soon? Is he trying to dump me? Has he found another woman? Please, help me.
MY DEAR, you did not even mention your name, neither did you give me your age so I have an idea how mature you are. Listen, yours is not really as straight forward as you think. The truth of the matter is, only your guy can tell us what the problem is. He may not have found another woman like you suspect, it could be something you said or did that he is probably not ready to talk about. And yes, there could be another woman in his life. And he could also be going through a difficult phase that he does not want to share with you. So, it could be anything. I will advice that you give him a bit more time, whatever the problem is, you will find out soon. If he’s tired of the relationship or there’s another woman, you will find out sooner or later because he will definitely become irritated if you insist on sorting things out with him rather than walking away if that’s what’s on his mind. Don’t push him, don’t fight him, just hang in there. Call him up, send him messages and check up on him at home, soon, everything will fall int know where you stand. Good luck, dear.
HELLO, DOCTOR LOVE, my name’s Mary. I need your help. I do not enjoy sex with my guy and he’s the only one I’m dating. I don’t want to cheat on him by testing it with another guy. Please, help me…0816881…
DEAR MARY, I would’ve liked to know your age first and find out from you if your guy met you a virgin. I say this because, from your text, you sound to me like you’ve never had sex with any other man apart from your boyfriend. If that’s the case, all you need to do is discuss your feelings with your man. Let him know your frustrations. Show him the part of your body that you would like him to touch and concentrate on. If he’s also the type that pays little attention to romance and foreplay and then mounts you even before you get wet, let him know your body doesn’t react well to this. You need to have an intimate discussion with him. It should really worry him too that you’re not enjoying sexual intimacy with him, any man worth his salt should be unselfish when it comes to lovemaking. If a woman can’t feel her man, and enjoy him, then its as bad as being punished by him. Open up to him and let him know how you feel, hopefully, if he cares about how you feel, he would put aside his own pleasures and work towards satisfying you.