Dearest Daddy,
The great use of life is to spend it for something that will outlast it: – William James
The thought of having to write a tribute for my father has for years filled me with dread as it meant having to consider the unthinkable – that you will no longer be in my life!
Alas, my dearest Daddy, the time is now, and I have to address one of my greatest fears. Over the last month, much has been said, and much has been written on the imprint you left on many – from those that knew you but also from many that didn’t have the opportunity to know you. As painful as it still is to have to confront your sudden but dignified exit the extraordinary outpour of commentaries, testimonies and stories has been a constant source of comfort and great pride to all of us.
You lived a diverse life, and in all aspects of your life you blazed a trail and left your stamp – professionally in law, banking and real estate; building your home and family; your steadfast Christian faith, your legendary style and sartorial elegance and your philanthropic activities.
You exemplified determination, never accepting the impossible and always guided by your mantra “there is no difficulty which prayers, hard work, industry, and perseverance cannot overcome.
Despite your larger-than-life persona, and your laudable achievements and successes, much of the reference was about the fundamentals of your character.
You were generous in spirit, you were highly principled, unapologetically flamboyant and still a person of deep humility, your respect for others irrespective of status or age, your forgiving nature.
Within the calls, messages, tributes and condolence visits I have often heard people say how their encounter with you was a life changing experience – you inspired, you were admired, you were copied!
To many, you were a role model and a reference point for what was possible.
You truly encapsulated the expression “a life well lived”, and as God in his infinite mercies showered his blessings on you, you also sought to give much back to your fellow man. As I reflect on the legacy you left for us, I cannot but think the most valuable of them is the name you have left behind and what Otunba Subomi Balogun connotes to many who shared and/or were present in the full life you lived. For your children, grandchildren and generations unborn we will continue to take benefit from your name. It will always be a source of pride, inspiration, determination and make us all strive for the better angels of our nature and follow your examples.
For years, I would sign off my greeting cards to you with, “: .from your proud and grateful son”. These words have taken a far greater significance since your passing as I continue to acknowledge the scale of the legacy your left and how incredibly blessed I was to have a father like you.
Your family was the very core of your life, your raison d’etre. From your “Olori”, our dear mother and your “four musketeers” (as you often proudly referred to us), you never made us or anyone else in doubt of this.
In the early years you were a strict disciplinarian, your practice of “tough love” was your method of character-building and instilling values around tradition, respect, integrity, hard work and humility. Once you felt you had firmly established the important life foundations, in later years the firmness gave way to a softness and unreserved love, support, understanding and dedication to myself, my brothers and our children. You were always a dependable source of encouragement and wise counsel.
I will always be grateful for the unwavering support structure provided by you and Mummy in our lives. You were a great double act each with your own distinctive and effective approach. In particular with you Daddy, I reflect with a smile the unashamed pride you would often display with my successes and accomplishments always ready to “shout about it from the rooftops”! It was an important element in confidence building for the young me, growing up.
I recall my call to Bar and the luncheon you sinqle-hondedly arranged (because Mummy had travelled), to celebrate the event. The collection of guests and, in particular, legal luminaries assembled was the talk of the town. I remember the joy and pride in your eyes as you handed me the wig and gown you had used for your call to bar. I was recently reminded by Mummy that both you and your dear friend the late Justice Onolaja were crying tears of joy on the day.
Only a few months ago and I, believe that was our last outing, you and Mummy joined me for lunch at the Lagos Motor Boat Club to celebrate mother’s day. I remember your excitement when I asked you. You had throughout the year been asking I confirm a date when you could come to support your son the new Commodore of the Club. The day was memorable and by the end of it, you promised you would be coming to the Club regularly as your way of supporting me during my tenure as Commodore. God, however, had greater plans!
You similarly extended this unfaltering love, dedication and support to our children. I remember the occasion, I had to attend a disciplinary hearing with my son Temi at his public school. You were concerned and had called me so we could go through the details of the incident and share views on the responses. On the day, despite my protestations,
you insisted that you wanted to also come along to stand with myself and Temi.
I recall the headmaster being visibly impressed to be confronted with 3 generations of Baloguns in attendance at the hearing and in particular their grandfather in his 80s who clearly still had his wits about him. Daddy, there are too many examples that I can write where you were always there for me, my children and your entire family!
Mummy mentioned that during your regular morning and evening prayers together, one of your ever-present prayer points was for the good Lord to give you more years to continue to be able to stand by us to the stage where we shall have nothing to fear. Daddy in many aspects your prayers were answered – with the legacy you left us, the character
fundamentals you demonstrated and established in us, the importance you placed on your family, you have left your family strong, united, able and committed to building on the family name.
I will miss you deeply! Although you are no longer physically with us, I am in no doubt that I and the family have earned our greatest advocate and defender in Heaven. I know you will continue to spiritually stand by and watch over us and in your typical way, be unrelenting and tenacious in ensuring our interests are always best served.
May your kind, beautiful and gentle soul rest in perfect peace – Omo Balogun Dodondawa!!
From your ever proud and grateful son
Jide Balogun
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