Aunty Florence looked up sharply at me. That jolted her back to reality. She was scared I could go suicidal. \u201cLook, Rosie, don\u2019t you ever think about doing anything stupid to yourself, not under my watch, do you hear me?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThen, help me get rid of this bastard in my womb, Aunty, I do not want to be a mother, I want to go to school like my mates!\u201d I\u2019d thrown at her, my emotions all coming to the fore.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBut you can go to school after you put to bed, Rosie. Nobody will stop you from continuing your education and\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAunty, don\u2019t you get it?\u201d I interjected before she was done talking. \u201cI don\u2019t want to be a student mother! I don\u2019t want to be in school and be distracted by the responsibilities of being a mother! I do not want to be the mother of a child whose father raped me and whose father\u2019s uncle took advantage of me! I don\u2019t want to hold onto anything that will be a sad reminder of the darkest moment of my life! \u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And the tears started to run quietly down my face. I tried to keep them away but couldn\u2019t. The harder I tried, the more they came gushing down.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Aunty Florence reached for me and pulled me close. She held me in a warm embrace and tried to comfort to me. But being comforted would not solve my problem, what I wanted was a solution. What I wanted was for her to take me to a doctor who would get rid of this pregnancy for me, that was what she promised me back in the village.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIt\u2019s okay, Rosie, stop crying, everything will be alright,\u201d she tried to calm me. \u201cSee, my dear, I really would love to help you, but I also\u2026. I also\u2026..\u201d her voice trailed off. She didn\u2019t finish what she was saying.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019m listening, Aunty, please, go on, why can\u2019t you help me?\u201d I asked her, desperate to get answers from her. Then, to my shock, Aunty started crying. Her tears were far heavier than mine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019m sorry, Rosie, you will have to have this child you\u2019re carrying and raise the baby here in my house\u2026..\u201d And she let out the tears all over again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBut, why, Aunty, I don\u2019t understand…why do you want me to have a child that I don\u2019t want to have?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
She wiped the tears from her face and tried to pull herself together. I was utterly stunned. Bewildered was more like it. Everything seemed like I was watching a movie. Only difference was, I was playing the lead role in the movie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Then, slowly, Aunty Florence cleared her throat, pulled herself together and began to quietly drop the biggest shocker of my life\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201dI have a confession to make to you, Rosemary, and I hope that you will find it in your heart to forgive me after you listen to my confession\u2026.will you forgive me, my darling?\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n
To say I was totally confused would be stating it mildly. I didn\u2019t understand what was going on. I didn\u2019t have the foggiest idea what Aunty was talking about. How could she be talking about asking for my forgiveness? Forgiveness for what exactly?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBut, Aunty, you\u2019re scaring me and getting me confused at the same time,\u201d I tried to express my state of utter shock. \u201cYou\u2019re asking me to forgive you, over what, Aunty? You have done nothing wrong to me now,\u201d I was close to tears now. The whole drama was getting me emotionally worked up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOkay, Rosie, I will explain to you now, but please, promise me you will forgive me and keep this between the two of us\u2026.\u201d She expected a response but I couldn\u2019t give her any because she still wasn\u2019t making any sense to me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cRosie, please tell me you will forgive me and keep this between the two of us!\u201d she raised her emotion laden voice. I responded with a nod of my head. But inside me, I was starting to wonder, what\u2019s going on here? Is this woman okay? Is she sick or something? But still, I kept my cool, waiting to hear what she has to say. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cMy dear, when I said to you in the village that I would help you get medical help when we ge to Lagos, I lied to you, I didn\u2019t plan to do anything like that!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBut why, Aunty, you said you were going to help me\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThat is why I am explaining everything to you right now, okay?\u201dI nodded. She continued. \u201cListen, my dear, I know you must\u2019ve been wondering why my husband and I really do not have any children. It\u2019s not deliberate, we just found ourselves childless after over five years of marriage. We have tried everything we can but no luck yet. The doctors keep assuring us we are both okay, that the babies would start arriving soon but nothing has happened yet. I was almost giving up. It was last year that I got a glimmer of hope when three pastors, at different times, different locations, told me that the simple solution to my childlessness was if I could get a woman who had never given birth to a child before to give birth to a child right under my roof and the child should be raised in my house. All three of them assured me that, if I could make this happen, will get pregnant in no time because of the cry of that new born baby would open my womb and bring forth my own child for me. And so, when your mum told me you were pregnant and wanted you to come with me to Lagos, at first, I didn\u2019t see how that was possible because my husband and I had agreed that no relatives would come live with us. But, when suddenly I remembered the prophecies of the three pastors, I saw it as perhaps an opportunity God was trying to give me to make my dream of becoming a mother come true. Then I decided I would speak to my husband and convince him to let you stay for a while, which I succeeded in doing. Even my husband does not know yet that you\u2019re pregnant, if he knew, he would never have allowed me bring you over.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
By the time she was done talking, my mouth was opened wide. It was like I was dreaming. It felt as though I was watching everything that was unfolding before me in one terribly bad dream.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSo, Aunty, are you telling me now tht, because of what the pastors told you, you will not help me? So, you want me to keep the pregnancy so I can have the baby under your roof? But what happens to me afterwards? What happens to my future if I become a mother before I\u2019m eighteen?\u201d I began to cry, the tears flowing freely down my face.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI promise you, Rosie, I will take care of your education and put you back in school, I promise you, I will,\u201d she pleaded.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was barely listening to her. I was as though some veil was lifted off my eyes and I realized I was being used. I realized there was no solution to my problem in Lagos or anywhere else for that matter. Once again, like Bobby\u2019s uncle took advantage of my situation and used me, Aunty Florence too has just done exactly the same thing. Just like the doctor back in the village wanted to take advantage of my situation and I didn\u2019t let him. It seemed everywhere I turned to for help, people were only willing to help if they could take advantage of me, even those I call family. So, everything was over. There was no way out of the situation I\u2019d found myself. There was no help anywhere. I was going to become a mother, whether I liked it or not. I was back to square one. I couldn\u2019t take it anymore. I let out a loud scream, rose to my feet and dashed out of the house, racing into the street before Aunty Florence could stop me\u2026\u2026\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n