Doctor Love, my name is Ada. You have got to help me, please! I just found out that one of my friends, Agnes, is pregnant for the man I want to marry. My fiance and I have been dating for a couple of years now and we’re finally planning to get married this December. I know he cheats on me with other girls but weeks ago I got the shocker of my life when I went through his phone and found several messages that showed that he had been dating my friend and that she is even pregnant for him. When I confronted him with it, he couldn’t deny him. He started pleading for forgiveness and assured me that my friend has agreed to abort the pregnancy. He still wants to marry me. What do I do, Wale, I’m so confused. Please, I beg you, conceal my number.
THIS IS A VERY tough situation you have found yourself in, my dear. It is very cruel that your fiancé could do this to you when you’re only a couple of months away from you wedding. And to make matters for you, you also happen to have friends that are utterly unreliable and unfaithful. You have very mean friends who do not give a hoot about you but care only about their happiness and satisfaction. What or how can I advise you now?
That you leave your fiancé and then let your friend come back to take him? Or ask you to close your eyes and ignore all he’s done regardless of the hurt he’s caused you and go ahead to marry him? Sweetheart, this is one call only you can make. It’s your decision to take. The good thing here is now you know the type of man you’re getting married to. If he could do this with your friend, then it means your sister, your house maid, your neighbour’s teenage daughter, nobody is safe from him. Some women take the issue of cheating very seriously.
They will tell you a broken relationship is better than a broken marriage and they walk away from the relationship. I’m not asking you to walk away from yours, all I’m saying is, if you’re going ahead with the wedding, then you must be prepared for the heartbreaks that it might and will definitely throw your away. A man that could get your friend pregnant even before you walk down the aisle together is capable of doing anything after the wedding has taken place. Except if, by some miracle, God himself appears and delivers him, this guy will never change. What you’re seeing now is what you’ll get. Period. So, if you know you can take the heart aches, please send me your wedding invite, I will gladly honour you with my presence
Doctor Love, please, help me, I have a big problem. I have girl I am presently dating. We have been dating for over a year now. She is 23 while I am 27 years old. I have already made up my mind that if all goes well I will marry this lady. Her name is Ifeoma. But the problem I have with her is that she is always using sex to extort money from me. Anytime she knows I am in t5he mood for sex and we already lying probably naked in bed, that is when she comes up with alkl manner of monetary demands and she would make sure I either give her the money right there and then before we continue our love making or she would make sure I make a commitment to giving her the money as soon as possible. I have told her repeatedly that I do not like this behavior but she has made up her mind not to stop. Doctor Love, I am no longer sure this is the girl I want to marry, what do you think, please advise me.
MY BROTHER, you have gotten yourself a very sharp babe! She knows your most vulnerable moment. She knows your weakest moment and she is using it to her full advantage. I don’t envy you at all. But seriously, to be honest, that’s not a good thing. That is certainly not a good sign of a woman who would make you a good wife. But it doesn’t also mean she can’t drop the habit and make a fantastic companion. Perhaps she believes she’s just having fun. Maybe she doesn’t think it’s such a bad thing because, after all, you are her sweetheart. And she probably feels you don’t part with money easily when you’re not under ‘agro’, if you know what I mean. I suggest you sit her down and let her know she does not need to use sex to ‘obtain’ money from you, that it does not portray her in good light. It makes her come across as one asking you for money to pay for sexual services rendered. Make her understand the implications of what she’s doing and why it bothers you terribly. I believe if she truly cares about you like you do about her, she will surely drop the habit. Best of luck, bro.
DOCTOR Love, my name is Peter. There is this girl that I just started talking to lately and I think she kinda likes me because when I asked her that has she ever thought of dating a guy she said ‘yes’ and when I asked her when she took the decision, she said ‘today’. So, definitely, I think she’s talking about me and I just wanna know if I can ask her to be my girlfriend. Is it right or wrong? Thank you.
MY dear Peter, I am not going to spend much time counseling you. Its not necessary. I will make yours very brief and straight to the point. NO! Capital NO, you cannot ask her to be your girlfriend. If you are familiar with this column you should know by now what I tell young people like you who come here asking for relationship advice. You are still way too young to dabble into these things. This is the time to focus solely on your academics. If you ask the girl to be your girlfriend and she says yes, the next thing you want to have with her is sex. You are about my second child’s age, and I cannot imagine her talking about the possibility of having a boyfriend let alone dating a guy. Only three things should be important to you and your age group right now, and that is education, education and education! So, please, stay away from that girl.
