As Ramadan, the month in which Muslims across the globe observe their 29 or 30 days obligatory fasting approaches, you would notice that there would be more and more Nikkah ceremonies held everywhere. It is usually a period of Nikkah rush as those who are single plan to get married.
The spouse usually fixes their Nikkah a few days and sometimes hours to Ramadan. They do this in a bid to commence their marital journey in the blessed month with high spirit devoid of distractions. They are eager to have the loving experience of living together as husband and wife and observing the Ramadan fasting as such. They pray together, eat together and do a lot as required in the holy month together as couples.
It is prescribed in Islam that getting married is one of the traditions of the Prophet Muhammad. No wonder, the prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said in the hadith, “O young men, whoever among you can afford it, let him get married, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and guarding chastity…” By getting married a person can, with the help of Allah, overcome many of the traps of evil, for marriage helps him to lower his gaze and guard his chastity, as the Prophet agreed upon.
Ramadan is a month which requires full concentration from fasting Muslims as they need to do away with unlawful intimacy which could lead to fornication, a very grievous sin to commit in the holy month.
Still on the significance of Nikkah, The Prophet was reported to have said in a hadith that: “Whomever Allah blesses with a righteous wife, He has helped him with half of his religion, so let him fear Allah with regard to the other half.” In another similar narration he said: “When a person gets married, he has completed half of his religion, so let him fear Allah with regard to the other half.”
One of the most frequently asked questions by Muslims who are still single when Ramadan approaches is “Can I cook for my boyfriend?” or “Can I take food prepared by my girlfriend for sahur and iftar?”. During Ramadan, Muslims are advised to not to have such a relation with a member of the opposite sex. Besides, boyfriends and girlfriend’s thing are not acceptable. Living with a woman without marriage is also forbidden. Islam only recommends marriage otherwise known as Nikkah once the spouse and their parents approve the union.
Be it in Ramadan or not, Islam abhors, despises and detests boyfriend/girlfriend relationships. So the question of cooking for the fake spouse in Ramadan should not even arise, at all. As much as one may not categorically declare such a food haram, legitimising it is as difficult as calling it illegal. One just has to be very careful in this regard.
A lady may cook for a man – no harm. A man may eat the sahur and/or iftar prepared by a woman – no harm. Intention is what matters. A student-bachelor, for instance, may eat the food(s) prepared by a student-spinster. This is just like buying ready-made food from a female food-vendor.
But it is safe to do away with anything that is likely to affect your spirituality. In what capacity will you be cooking for your boyfriend? Wife, sister, neighbour or what? And as what will you be consuming your girlfriend’s delicacies? Is it a darling hubby, brother, neighbour or what? You can’t deceive Allah, you know. Know that distraction and provocation to make your fasting imperfect comes many times during Ramadan. You must be tactful to read the sign. It may appear in the form of your boyfriend or girlfriend.
Ramadan is all about shunning evils, breaking bad habits, developing good habits, and thus coming closer to Allah. In order to do what is right ahead of Ramadan, the man fixes Nikkah as he marries his spouse with her parents’ consent. That is the way of making it lawful (halal) in Islam. Hence, if marriage is not an option in a relationship, it is better to end it and seek repentance for it is unlawful to date for dating sake in Islam.
-Jamiu Abubakar
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